Have you ever heard of Satya – the yogic practice of Truthfulness?
Imagine yourself coming home after a nice shopping day. You just spent 300$ on some gorgeous boots and you feel a bit guilty, but hey, it’s been a while since you treated yourself and so what, money needs to flow, right? Your partner watches you unpacking your boots and he or she looks at you with a smile and says, “Oh, these must-haves cost a fortune, right?“. Before you think you hear yourself answer, “Oh no, I got them on sale, they were the last pair and I only paid 100$ for them. Aren’t they gorgeous?” You notice a little iffy feeling inside of you, and wonder why were you not just sharing the truth?
We all do it in some form or another, we cancel dinner dates saying we committed already to something else, when the truth is, we just don’t feel like seeing anybody and rather stay home. These might seem like small lies with little consequences, but what I am getting at is that it’s so much more liberating to learn to speak your truth.
So why are you afraid to tell your truth?
Every time you don’t speak your truth or honor your needs, you’re not acting with the fullest integrity towards yourself. In the end, how can you fully trust yourself if you’re finding excuses or lying about things here and there? To train your muscle of Self Trust and Confidence you can start by learning to speak your truth. Every time you catch yourself wanting to find an excuse or use a little lie, instead take a deep breath and share what’s really true for you.
“In the Vedas and later Sutras, the meaning of the word Satya evolves into an ethical concept about truthfulness and is considered an important virtue. It means being true and consistent with reality in one’s thought, speech, and action.”
The beauty is that when you start sharing your truth from a soft, honest place in your relationships, it will be well received. And it’s like you’re building your muscle of truth as you keep doing it. Starting with the “small stuff”, it feels so liberating, that you will get more courageous to also share your bigger stuff.
You’ll create more trust in yourself and feel more connected to your own needs. You’ll also practice receiving truth from other people with more softness and less judgment.
The practice of Satya through Dyad
Here’s a great practice, known as Dyad, which totally saved my relationship during Covid Lockdown. We were having a hard time communicating, missing our own space, and were getting into constant little nagging arguments, which we normally don’t do. So we started the practice of Dyad or Sacred Space. Each person gets to share for 10 minutes (times can vary, you can also do a few rounds like 3x 10 minutes each) and while one person speaks, the other only listens. After 10 minutes you say only thank you and switch to the 2nd person. After the 2nd person finishes you either stop or do another round (I love doing this also on retreat, it’s great with people you don’t know so well too). You don’t comment on what the other person said and just let it be spoken and heard.
What is so great about this?
In my own experience, the practice contributed to deepening my relationship with my partner. I have come to really love Daniel again for the unique person he is. I see how he moves through his day, what he feels, what he thinks about and it’s free of my own lens of judgment or assumptions. I often felt there wasn’t enough space for me in our relationship to say all I wanted to say, yet in this practice often I didn’t know what else to share and had 4 minutes left! So I would consciously think about how I want to spend the next 4 minutes and often use it for gratitude and appreciation towards Daniel or my life. I can only tell you how much it has improved our life and communication. When we were going through this rough time we did the practice daily, these days we do it maybe once a week. Note: It’s not necessary to make it about your relationship, you can use your time to share ANYTHING you like to share. But of course, it also helped us to communicate relationship issues. Just be honest!
Satya creates harmony, and trust me, those people who are not willing to listen to your truth or let you be who you want to be? Maybe it’s time to shift and create new relationships. But always remember, everything starts with you. Your willingness to speak the truth will encourage others to be honest with you, and wouldn’t you want that?
Dagmar Spremberg is the founder and director of Montezuma Yoga in Costa Rica. While growing up in Germany all she could envision for herself was a life in the sunshine and under palm trees. After 20 years of soul searching and many detours that let her explore city life in Los Angeles and New York, she found her dream life by the beach in the lush & tropical nature of Costa Rica. Through her own experience, she believes that everybody can live their dreams and that our work is to become clear and open to receiving the gifts we all deserve.