Interview: Parenting in a new world – with George Maddick

In this inquisitive and open conversation with George, we learn about his journey of becoming a young father, building his life and family according to his vision of a world more connected to the earth. He is also an integral part of our Mandali family, passionately taking care of our gardens and grounds. All the stunning photography in this article are by also by George.

Has becoming a father changed you, and contributed to your spiritual growth?

Yes, definitely, and at an intense speed! What comes to mind first is about being a man, stepping into my masculinity and embracing what it means to be a father and the want to provide, to create a safe space for growth, with a child on the way and arriving. I revealed myself, put my true self forward, rather than showing a mask. 

Then also, seeing how nature, the garden, has been showing me how it mirrors being a parent. How natural the kids are, like an open book. Each page is so authentic and real, they don’t ask anything in return, you are just able to receive them as children, as they are. It is like the garden, the forest, they just are, it’s the same.

Everything I learn by being a parent, I can take to other areas of my life, my work, my relationship with my partner, my friends and the way I see the world. I see my kids interact, share their love with others, not just mum and dad,  and completely trust people of different ages, and that has shown me a lot about possessiveness, and giving acceptance and freedom, to them and my partner. 

I grew in every aspect, being a conscious parent, better partner, friend and having a sense of purpose in the way we are creating our life.

What are some things you do differently than from the way you were raised, discipline, for example?

When the kids arrived, I saw how deeply ingrained our social conditioning is about what it means to raise a family, even though I knew that the ‘traditional’ way is not how we wanted to do things. 

Working in the garden shows me that getting away from social conditioning is simply growing new branches, going off into different directions, expanding, in a different and better way, naturally. The kids too, are new branches, different to us, and if we let them grow uninhibited, we can learn from them too. We just have to give them time and space, and be curious about who they are.

When it comes to ‘discipline’ it’s a challenge, because I experienced it in the ‘traditional’ sense. I try to cancel out specific words from my vocabulary, the word ‘discipline’ itself, as I don’t think it necessarily needs to exist. It closes doors and space kids need to develop, to push barriers and grow.  If one of them is doing something wrong, like say, drawing on the walls, I check first what he is trying to create, to be interested in what he is doing, try to listen and understand his project, before I try to save the wall. 

It’s also so important to just be able to have a conversation, father to son, like a friend. The other day one of the boys experimented cutting his own hair for the first time, and when he realised what he had done, many hours of intense emotions followed (as you can imagine). We gave him the space to explore those feelings, and at the end I was able to talk to him, ‘Hey man, that’s what happened, you did it to yourself, it’s gonna be fine.’ It’s important to create that trust.

As an artist yourself,  how do you encourage creativity in your kids?

One of the boys is great at languages, so my first instinct was to push him, are you good at that? Let’s get better. Then I caught myself, wait, do you want to get better? Or are you just good at that? And then having the confidence to say, ‘Ok, you’re good at that. And if you want to do more, we do more. But you’ve reached a level which was enjoyable for you, so if you want to stop, that’s ok too.’  

You have to be the parent, it’s our job to guide them and give them the field in which to be creative and then look after the boundaries, like the shepherd. Just provide the field, and they will grow. I can’t go into the field and start pushing them too much in any direction they need to explore it. I think we’re able to see that in everything that they do. 

You are very connected to nature and the outdoors, what are some things you do with your kids to share that passion?

We go into the forest all the time, it’s just part of who we are. It’s so normal, that sometimes they push back a little, they would rather go and hang out in the supermarket (to my dismay) 🙂 , do something that’s the polar opposite. But the moment they are in the forest, it’s obvious that it’s part of their inner language. Their nature is to be outside and the forest their home. They go with the flow and know how to play and have fun, which is really nice to see.

Do you wish, as a family unit in your own way, that you can help change the world a little? 

I think that as a family we can be a blueprint for others, an example of how easy it can be to  live in a simple way, where less is more, where we live in tune and with nature’s rhythm. 

Our traditional way of doing things is very ingrained in us,  our consumer life-style where our values are based on economic growth is what’s ‘normal’.  So a more holistic and wholesome approach seems like something very far removed, impossible to achieve. But it isn’t, we are doing it, and others around us too. It is much easier than it seems!

If we continue to prioritise providing money, and busying ourselves with work and projects, we are actually missing the biggest opportunity for our family’s and the world’s growth.

I really think that the most important thing that the world needs is examples of how easy it is to do what we once did so naturally. I feel we have just overslept and we all have to wake up eventually. 

There’s no separation between anything that we do whether it’s in an office, outdoors, or any job you have. Let’s question ourselves, if it’s not aligned with the benefit of the planet, our people and all creatures of the natural world, then why are we doing it? 

About George:

George Maddick is a passionate horticulturist with a deep understanding of the role nature plays in all aspects in today’s world. Seeing how nature gives, and also what it needs,  is a reminder and reflection of ways that we can improve our physical and mental health, in turn providing a healthier and more vibrant environment. He enjoys exploring boundaries in both his work and personal life, in how deep we can go in better understanding the clear messages nature is providing us everyday.  In this way,  we can learn to fall back in line with our most important rhythm – the one nature has provided for us.

How the Elements Heal Us

So much of the fracturing, I see in my clients, and in the collective, comes from one fundamental illusion: the feeling that we are separate from nature. Ancient cultures all over the world lived in deep reverence for the natural world and saw all of humanity as an interdependent part of the whole. Within this deep respect for plants, animals, the sun, moon, and stars, there was also a deep respect for the elements.  The elements represent us. They represent different aspects of who we are and the gifts we carry. When they are in balance, we are in balance. 

The elements represent us. They represent different aspects of who we are and the gifts we carry. When they are in balance, we are in balance.

Fire

Fire represents the spirit, the flame, and the creative passion we all have. Our fire is our childlike desire to play. It is also our unbridled passion and our tenacious ability to transform what is no longer healthy for us or others. Fire purifies us. The practice of gazing into the flame of a candle in a dark room cleanses our eyes and perhaps, our energetic vision. We work with fire when we want to release something. Fire teaches us that rather than throwing something away, we can surrender it to our Spirit to let it be transformed into something new. 

Water

Water represents our intuition, our receptivity, our openness, and our ability to go through or around anything. Water is our emotional intelligence, our subtle senses, and our imagination. Water supports us by helping us find compassion. Our bodies are over 70% water, and all of life on earth is nourished by water. In ancient times, sacred wells and watering holes were where people gathered to heal themselves. Water teaches us to reflect and see everything around us as a sacred mirror. 

Air

Air is the element of communication. It represents the wind carrying our prayers and hopes to the heavens, our ability to sing and express and clear the air when we seek connection and understanding. Air also represents the intellect, which can support and transmit our creative dreams when it is working in harmony with the other elements. When we stand in a strong wind, we may hear it whisper to us. When we let wind dance all around us, it cleanses us and helps us to let go of what we are grasping. 

Earth

And lastly, the beloved earth is the element of our bodies. It is the element of the plant and animal kingdom, the stone people, and our ancestors. Earth is our fertility, the warm embrace of nutrient-dense soil that protects the seeds that have yet to grow. The earth element helps us to ground our spirit, helps us to slow down, be patient, and listen. The earth element teaches us slow transformation built by maintaining healthy habits. It teaches us creativity and sensuality. The earth is the home of decomposers, mushrooms, and mosses that are thousands of years old. The redwoods and the mountains teach us about the stillness and silence available to us when we know who we are and trust our own wisdom. 

 The earth is our body, the water is our blood. The wind is our breath and the fire is our spirit. When we respect the natural world, it brings us healing. When we respect ourselves, and every element within us, we can become a vessel for healing the natural world, and the spiritual world, and remind ourselves that we are so incredibly connected. 

Conclusions

Perhaps you have an affinity for one element more than another or even a resistance to a specific element. The beautiful thing about the elements is that they are meant to work together. When we balance the elements within us, we find peace. When we have a lot of mental chatter, we can work with the earth by moving our bodies and grounding ourselves by putting our feet on the roots of a tree, and allowing that mental energy to move.  When we have a lot of fire, we can work with the air element by journaling onto paper what our spirit is desiring and wants to transform, or we can cool ourselves with a cup of water we have blessed by holding it in our hands while focusing on who and what we love most in this world. When the water element within us overwhelms us emotionally, we can work with the fire of the Sun to warm us and bring us back up from the depths of our grief. We can also transmute our feelings with the element of air by singing a song.

You see, we are the elements. The earth is our body, the water is our blood. The wind is our breath and the fire is our spirit. When we respect the natural world, it brings us healing. When we respect ourselves, and every element within us, we can become a vessel for healing the natural world, the spiritual world, and remind ourselves that we are so incredibly connected. 

One of the simplest ways to begin to connect to the elements is to prepare a ritual bath. To inspire you, here is a bath from my book, Ritual Baths.


I Am Nature Ritual Bath

When we talk about getting grounded, what we are really talking about is returning to the source, returning to the truth of where we come from, returning to the earth. This bath is designed to help us remember the truth of who we are. Follow this bath with a walk outside. If there are certain ingredients that you do not have on hand, don’t worry. Your intention is the most powerful part of this ritual. 

Ingredients

  • Red clay, mixed with bentonite clay and Graviola powder, nettle leaf powder, or matcha
  • 1 cup black lava salt
  • 1 cup pink rose petals
  • 1 bunch of fresh rosemary
  • 10 drops each of rose and rosemary essential oils
  • All of your non-water-soluble crystals

Ritual

Mix clay and plant powders with spring water to create a thick paste. Cover your body head to toe with the mixture. If you have the luxury, go outside naked, covered in the mixture. Stand in the sun. When the paste begins to dry, rub it off your body. It will create a fine, very exfoliating dust. Notice how grounding and awakening this practice is. If you cannot go outside naked and covered in green mud because your neighbors will be convinced that the zombie apocalypse is here, then prepare your bath while you’re letting the mixture dry. Place all the other ingredients in the bath at a temperature of your choosing.

Light a candle. Create a smudge using white sage by putting it in a nonflammable tray of some kind and igniting it. Waft the smoke around your body using a feather you have found. Step into the bath and dunk your head underwater. Place the crystals on your body wherever your intuition is guided to place them. Sing this song (original author unknown):

Earth my body. Water my blood. Wind my breath. And fire my spirit.

Take ten deep, grounding breaths. Sit and soak in the medicine you’ve created.

Summary:

  • Fire represents the spirit, the flame, and the creative passion we all have.
  • Water represents our intuition, our receptivity, our openness, and our ability to go through or around anything. 
  • Air is the element of communication. It represents the wind carrying our prayers and hopes to the heavens, our ability to sing and express and clear the air when we seek connection and understanding.
  • Earth is the element of our bodies. It is the element of the plant and animal kingdom, the stone people, and our ancestors.

About Deborah:

Deborah Hanekamp aka Mama Medicine is a *Seeress carrying over 16yrs in the healing arts as an Initiated Amazonian Shaman, Reiki Master, and Yogini. Guided by the present moment, Deborah has facilitated Medicine Readings and Medicine Reading Ceremonies all over the world. Her work has been featured in Vogue, New York Times & Marie Claire Magazine

5 tips to start 2022 off on the right foot

1. ​Spend as much time in nature as possible and oxygenate the brain and body.

This might seem obvious but in this world of urban living and busyness, we spend too much time in our isolated, unventilated homes. Commit to going on daily short walks and going into a natural park for longer periods at least once a week. Time spent walking in a heavily forested environment changes our whole outlook on the day. Many of us go for prolonged periods of time without immersing ourselves in the freshness of nature. Since we are spending many hours a week wearing a mask, we want to give ourselves the gift of clean air. At Mandali, we have the advantage of pristine nature and unpolluted air all around us.

2.Avoid conversations and people who get into heated polarized, political, social, or cultural views.

Life is short and as the ancient Greeks used to say, “take the time to understand other(s) and when others are more interested in the position of being “right” rather than the all-encompassing view of understanding that we have different ways of seeing the world than walk away”. The chaos of today is forcing people to choose sides and sometimes we have to choose a side. Whatever side you choose, you want to cultivate respect, understanding, and empathy for the other view.  If you feel yourself arguing and getting angry that others have a difference of opinion, remove yourself from the environment, breathe and remember that every view has merit (even if it is only 1% true).  Do not compromise your state of equanimity for anyone or anything. The wise person listens with friendliness and decides whether to engage or disengage without causing harm or hatred.  

​3. ​Honestly review your day – Practice Self-Inquiry.

Ask yourself at the end of each day: Where did I compromise my highest values? Where was I self-aware and kind and where did I lose the plot today? By doing this regularly, you will spend more and more time living the kind of day that brings joy and fulfillment. Ask yourself: what did I do well today? Where was my discipline tested? Where did I not do so well today? How can I improve tomorrow? Just don’t beat yourself up. Remember to forgive yourself daily.  Practice self-compassion. Research shows that forgiving yourself, not beating yourself up, prevents you from continuing to put things off. Don’t just be critical of yourself. Think about what you did well so you can repeat it tomorrow. Be grateful for the good that happened today!  

4. ​Take multiple short 5-minute mindfulness breaks throughout the day.

This will reset your nervous system. Practice your favourite breathing meditation. Breathe in consciously and imagine that with every exhale, you are removing the mask of tension. Use your hands in a gesture of gathering air and imagine you are inhaling pure, clean air, and with every exhale, you could even put your hand on your face imagining you are removing stuck masks: the mask of disappointment, the mask of tiredness, the mask of the fear of uncertainty.  This exercise produces unfathomable results.  By consciously breathing and imagining that we are unmasking ourselves of our struggles and pain, the joy of our original face is revealed.  

5. ​Move your body vigorously at least once a day.  

Dance to your favourite song. Moving to one short song instantly changes your chemistry. If you are not sure what song to play, we have attached a fun short song here.  Moving your body in creative and emotionally expressive ways reduces stress and depression, increases energy and serotonin, increases mental capacity and creativity, and increases so much joy that we are better equipped to handle the ups and downs of home and work life.

Here’s a little feel good moment:


Jon Bastiste- FREEDOM https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3YHVC1DcHmo